A priest is in the confessional giving penance one day, and he realizes that he has to take a leak. He waves over a nearby nun and says to her, “Sister, please deliver penance for a short while as I must perform a necessary function.”
The nun agrees, but looks a little puzzled. “Father, how will I know what penance to give to who?”
The priest replies, “There’s a little list on the wall. Consult it and it’ll tell you what to do.” and he runs off.
A few minutes later, a man walks into the confessional and says, “Father forgive me, for I have sinned. I have stolen from my neighbor.”
The nun looks at the list on the wall and finds stealing on the list. “Say two Hail Marys and be on your way.” She thinks to herself, this isn’t too hard.
A few minutes later, another fellow walks in.
“Father forgive me, for I have sinned.” he says. “I have fornicated.”
The nun looks on the list and finds fornication. She says to him, “Say two Hail Marys and an Our Father and be on your way.” She then starts thinking, “This isn’t hard at all! I could do this more often!”
A third man walks in and says, ” Father forgive me, for I have sinned. I had oral sex,”
The nun looks at the list on the wall but she can’t find a listing for oral sex. She looks around nervously and spots an altar boy. She pulls him aside and asks him, “What does the Father give for oral sex?”
The boy replies, “I don’t know what he gives you, Sister, but he gives me two Snickers bars and a pat on the head.”
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Paul Hunt – 1988 Olympic floor gymnastics
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Women’s gymnastics falls
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